two-twenty

gance fever

There's really only one lesson to be learned here: Ryan Seacrest is so rabidly desperate for press that, in order to garner some column-inches, he will claim to be part of a fake trend which involves men pantomiming the act of giving birth to one another on the dancefloor. Either that, or he quite literally has performed "The Lumberjack" with a boy friend (that's a friend who's a boy, silly, not like a boyfriend or anything!). Just what is this "Lumberjack", you ask? Allow Stuff Magazine to explain:

Gancer No. 1 stands in the middle of the dance floor with arms raised to indicate that they are branches and he is a tree. Gancer No. 2 pretends to be holding an ax and hacks away at the fleshy tree. Gancer No. 1 bends backward until finally toppling—trust fall–style—into gancer No. 2’s arms. Gancer No. 2 catches the tree, throws him into the air again and, together, they start boogying wildly.

Lovely. And, dare we say it? Manly. Very manly.

Everybody Gance Now! | Stuff Magazine
MALE-DANCE FEVER: JUST KIDDING, GUYS | Page Six

Wait, there is one more lesson to be learned here. Before you go off declaiming about an absurd new trend, take a look at your calendar. Put your finger on the date April 1. Now count out ten days in either direction (this is easy to remember because it is same number as how many digits you have on your hands. That means fingers). Shade that whole block of dates in with your favorite crayon. Now, if you have learned about this absurd new trend that has your panties in a knot on a date that is shaded in, DO NOT WRITE ABOUT IT. You will thank us in the morning.

Metrosexual Morons Gancing the Night Away | MensNewsDaily.com