two-twenty

real world israeli beer-scrabble challenge | joanna

Having spent the entire day at two-twenty, Ash and I decided to while away a few hours last night playing beer-scrabble at Calico Jack's Cantina. We never ever would have picked the place on our own, but Murph Guide's advertisement for their $2 Tuesday special seemed just the ticket to assuage our wanderlust while maintaining gentle pressure on our hemorrhaging finances (hemorrhaging incurred by buying tickets for said wanderlust). After narrowly escaping The Campbell Apartment's tractor beam en route (okay, Ash literally had to drag me by the hand to circumvent it), we arrived at the bar's location on 42nd and 2nd.

Past the plant-covered concrete barricades, and through the door, we found that few others were as enticed as we were by the promise of drinking cheap booze while making fun of people playing in a beer pong tournament. The bar was practically dead, save for a few nimrods, one of whom body-blocked me on my way to the ladies' room just to say "hi". There was, in fact, no beer pong tournament, nor were there any $2 specials other than Corona. Maybe we were just too late. We sat down at a table by the window with our beers, and commenced playing Scrabble.

One Corona down (and with Ash in the lead), we headed out for a smoke. Noticing the line of concrete barricades again, and the Policeman stationed at the end of the row, we wondered why the corner that seemed only to house Calico Jack's and an Irish bar needed protection. Ash approached the cop-in-a-box, inquiring about the "blast walls".

"If I told you I'd have to kill you," the guy replied, scarcely exiting his station. Giggling inanely at his own oh-so-original joke, he went on to explain that the building we were in, the one in which we sat drinking Coronas by the window, housed the Israeli Consulate. Yeah, that Israeli Consulate.

After a brief conversation in which Ash and I decided never to drink at Calico Jack's without his and hers flak jackets, we bought another round and finished playing Scrabble. You might say that the game, like the outing, was a close call. Well, Ash might call the game a close call (he lost), and I might call the outing a close call (I'm a loser).

Should you feel like tempting fate, this Saturday Calico Jack's paints a big fat bullseye on its forehead in more ways than one: they are having an "Appletini & Spring Bikini Party"  hosted by MTV's reality stars Veronica and Brad.

Gives new meaning to the phrase Inferno Fantasy Challenge, doesn't it? 

Go ahead, take the challenge. If you don't get blown up, you might be able to take home a very special memory, like of Brad slobbering all over your face, or, perhaps, of Brad slobbering all over your girlfriend's face. Or maybe Veronica's. Almost makes you want to pick the getting blown up option, huh?